***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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