Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
