Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
