I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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