I want to stick my p in your. b.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize