hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
