New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
