I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
