so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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