my being single is dangerous.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
