I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Randomize
