woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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