How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize