so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
