just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize