yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
