CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
