Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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