Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
