I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
