Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
