But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
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