Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
