Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
