come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize