You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
pop tarts are not kleenex
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
