The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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