i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
ttyl tear gas
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Randomize
