Are we in a gay sports bar?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
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