You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
