just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Alive.
So much puke
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
