Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Randomize
