oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
