Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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