kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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