Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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