honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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