Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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