VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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