508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
