miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
