some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize