I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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