We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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