it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
