Well douche your snatch and let's go!
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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