hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize