I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
