That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
