I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
