she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Randomize
